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Post by jacob dylan hart on Sept 30, 2010 15:05:14 GMT -5
 So I put out my hand and I asked for some help
(We tore down the walls I built around myself )
I WAS STRUCK BY THE LIGHT AND I FELL TO THE GROUND - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - You would think that on a Saturday night that someone like Jacob would be out with his new girlfriend right? Well no. He was upset and didn't want to be around his mother. His father was just killed in Afghanistan last night. And so Jacob had woken up to his mother crying on the kitchen floor. It was a terrible, but Jacob just couldn't be around his mother anymore. It was just himself and her since the middle of two years ago. Now it was forever. Two losses of his family members, the only people he was close to. Himself and his mother now. Forever.
About four hours or so ago, Jacob had sliced open his wrist, like he usually did when he was this upset. His face was tear stained, but he quickly wiped it away. He sat in the sand, his eyes still completely watery and he didn't have anyone to tell. He wasn't sure if Sapphire would want to see him like this, but he didn't know what else to do. He needed to get his mind off of his father's death. He had dyed his hair brown about three days ago, but he couldn't keep it like that.. he didn't like it and with his father's death, he turned it back to being black. He was sure that his hair was just going to have to stay black now. He bit his lip, digging his feet in the sand. His converse sat next to him, covered in sand. It was probably dusk, the sunset was beautiful, but that really didn't cheer the boy up to much.
Jacob pulled the black sweatshirt closer to him, pulling the hood of the hoodie over his head and he put his chin on his knees. Everyone was packing up and leaving the beach now, but not Jacob. He sat there in the sand, away from everyone else who was leaving, he didn't want to be in the way, nor did he want anyone to know why he was crying. He sat there watching the water, the sunset was really pretty. He pulled his silver blackberry out of his pocket and texted Sapphire. ”Come to the beach...the sunset is really pretty...and I want to tell you something..” he said in the text. He didn't know how he was going to tell her that he wasn't sure what to do now. His father just died, and he's life was now all screwed up.
He pulled his knees to his chest and buried his face into his knees. His tears were stopping, which was good. His eyes were probably all red, but what could he do. Hopefully it would get dark after she arrived and she wouldn't see his eyes. He didn't know how to tell her. He had bracelets on, trying to hide the cuts that he gave himself, well. They were there to hide the rather obnoxious white bandage on his wrist. He had thrown the sweatshirt on in the car when he realized that you could still see the bandage after trying to put the bracelets on. He didn't mind the sweatshirt though, it was really rather comfy actually. He held it close to him and sighed. He brushed the tears away again. How was he going to keep it together after Sapphire got here. He would have to somehow hold it together, and not ever tell her about his wrist. She would flip, she would get so mad at him, or worse. Actually pull on his wrist and then he would wince and then she would know what he did. He would have to just make sure she didn't touch his arm. That was his best plan.
He held his phone in his hand, watching the screen, which went black, waiting to see if she would answer. Maybe she wouldn't come. Maybe she would. He didn't know what to do. What was he going to tell her when she asked what did he want to tell her. He would tell her that his father died last night, and he hoped to god she didn't think of him as a baby when he would choke it out. It would be hard to tell her, he wasn't sure how he would tell her. His black hair was over his right eye, as usual and he was glad that his face was hidden. The shadows from it getting dark also helped to hide his face from everyone as they walked by him, to their cars to leave.
( W O R D S ? !) 755
( S T A T U S ? !) done
( O U T F I T ? !) live your lies
( N O T E S ? !) hope this was okay for a place..it was the only place I could think of.
( C R E D I T ? !) this lovely code was made by dear joey AKA xoxsilvermoonox of the lovely CAUTION 2.0 don't steal this or else I will send my rabid heffalumps and woozles after you!! (: the lyrics are by papa roach |
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Post by sapphire khloe madison on Oct 1, 2010 18:14:13 GMT -5
Hearing her phone go off Saffie rolled over from the middle of her large queen size bed to the edge. She then reached over, grabbed her expensive state of the art phone from her bedside table before checking the text. She noticed it was Jacob. She quickly texted back she would be right over before closing her phone. She put it back onto her bedside table before closing the fashion magazine she had been flicking through. She then picked up the television remote she had on her bed and switched off her widescreen HD tv before getting up off the bed. She didn't know what he was going to ask her. Maybe he was going to ask her about the date he was supposed to be planning. Or maybe this would be the date and he was going to ask her to be his girlfriend? Well, she would have to look really good just incase this was the date. Who knows, he could have a table with chairs set up on the beach with a white table cloth, candles, and a romantic meal. Now that would be epic.
With a happy smile upon her full lips she opened up her wardrobe before flicking through the many outfits she had. She could go for a very sexy dress, or a revealing skirt with a good top. It seemed like hours later before Saffie finally settled on an outfit. She ended up wearing a gorgeous pair of Ug boots, black leggings, a red halter dress top which went to mid-thigh with a plunging v neckline, along with a white off the shoulder cashmere jumper. Her hair was curled nicely, and she had put make-up onas well as perfume. Perfect she thought for a date. Especially one at the beach at sunset. He couldn't have picked a better place or a better time. He really was romantic. She couldn't wait to get to the date. After all she had told him to contact her when and where for the date. They weren't friends. Not officially, and she had only just met him so why would she even think he was asking her to meet him for anything but the date?
It didn't take the chauffer long to get her to the beach. Picking up her designer handbag with her phone and necessities in it she slid out of the black stretch limosine. She wanted to arrive in style. She wanted to impress him. Especially since she guessed he had gone to a lot of trouble to set the date up. However when she got down to the beach and where Jacob was she found herself disappointed. There was nothing here. This couldn't be the date. So why on earth had he asked her to meet him here? Frowning she made the rest of the way over to him before sitting down confused.
"I thought we were going on a date..."
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Post by jacob dylan hart on Oct 2, 2010 10:31:15 GMT -5
So I put out my hand and I asked for some help
(We tore down the walls I built around myself )
I WAS STRUCK BY THE LIGHT AND I FELL TO THE GROUND - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Maybe it really was a bad idea to ask Sapphire to come to the beach. Maybe she thought he would have gone all out when really he didn't know what to do. He wasn't even sure if he should even go out with her after today. He wasn't really even sure if she would want to go out with him after tonight. Since he didn't really plan anything out for the date, cause honestly, his mind wasn't even there. His mind was more about how his mother was taking the death of his father. She had gone back to bed with a load of medicine, something like sleep pills or something and told him she needed time to herself. He wasn't sure if she was trying to kill herself or not, since his mother did the same thing after his brother died.
After a moment, she answered saying she would be over. Weather that was a good thing now, or a really bad thing, since she probably thought that he was going to go all out for the date on a beach, and be a hopeless romantic on her. But he wasn't. He wasn't really a hopeless romantic yet, he honestly wasn't sure what she even liked, since of course he didn't really talk to her, they just sort of made out in the courtyard during class. Jacob knew that he would have to pull himself together some how, how he wasn't exactly sure right this moment. His pale blue eyes stared at the water and the horizon, waiting an just watching. He knew his father's body would be flying into the states in a few days, and then the funeral and he would have to go to Washington DC to see his father buried in Arlington. And then his mother would want to visit all of the sites that were there, since neither of them had ever been to Washington D.C.
When he heard Sapphire's voice, he heard all of the disappointment in it. She had to have thought he went to a whole lot of trouble on the beach for her, which was really not the case. He just really didn't know who else to text and talk to. Sure, Luke was there for him, but still. ”I'm sorry.. I didn't really know what really do to...and I thought that you would like to see how pretty the sunset was without anyone around or anything..” he said. Now he had to tell her that he would have to leave for a week or something around there. Would she just tell him that maybe they shouldn't go out? Since this really wasn't a great date. Just the sound of her voice with the disappointment in it was sad. She probably had expected a lot more out him then what she had got. Jacob wiped the tears away from his eyes again and looked at her. She looked really nice, and he was just in a hoodie and shorts. She went all out on him, and he looked like crap. Well, now he could see why she sounded very disappointed in him.
”I have to leave for a week to go to Washington DC in three days.”
( W O R D S ? !) 755
( S T A T U S ? !) done
( O U T F I T ? !) live your lies
( N O T E S ? !) hope this was okay for a place..it was the only place I could think of.
( C R E D I T ? !) this lovely code was made by dear joey AKA xoxsilvermoonox of the lovely CAUTION 2.0 don't steal this or else I will send my rabid heffalumps and woozles after you!! (: the lyrics are by papa roach |
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Post by sapphire khloe madison on Oct 4, 2010 14:59:25 GMT -5
Saffie was definately disappointed. She had given him a chance to be a man, to be romantic, and to gain some confidence. He had done nothing. It didn't even seem like he had planned to see her today anyway. Especially by his attire. She had wanted him to prove to her that she didn't like him for no reason. That he was actually suited for her and did have potential to be more then he currently was. In doing nothing he had only backed up the reasoning they were too different to be together. He had no self esteem and no confidence. He was a complete wimp. Even when they were alone it seemed he couldn't even bring himself to do anything. She hated that he had proved her wrong and that he had proved the rest of the school right. He had even managed to prove the stereotypes right. Even a small gift such as a tacky ring from a sweets cylinder would have at least been something. Saffie didn't think it could get any worse and then Jacob mentioned he was leaving for a week. A WEEK. Any decent guy would have definately brought a gift for their girl with that kind of news to tell. Something to smooth the impact. She had wasted her first kiss on him.
"You can't be serious! I waited for years to have my first kiss Jacob. I wanted to wait for the right guy for me, and you took it! I gave you an opportunity to prove to me that there was something good and worthwhile between us. Just having a blanket and a small packet of fries from the fish and chip shop would at least have been something! Any guy with that kind of news would at least have brought along something to give to make the news less... horrific. I just... I can't believe this! I risked everything for you! I told you things I have never told another living soul and you can't even try for me."
At that point Saffie burst into tears. She couldn't help it. She had never felt so worthless and rejected in her entire life.
"I knew at some point I would have to be rejected and hurt by a guy but I never thought for one second you would do that. You know what? Your just like the guys that bully you. I'm out of here."
She stood up, sobbing her heart out, as she turned and headed back up the beach. After everything she had done and sacrificed for Jacob... He couldn't even try for her. He couldn't even try to make things work. He couldn't even try to make her feel special or happy. She didn't understand. How could this happen? Anything would have been better then this. As she got back up to the parking lot Saffie noticed the limo was gone. Sobbing, causing her body to shake, she pulled out her mobile phone and called a local taxi company. She just hoped she had enough money on her to pay for the ride home.
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Post by jacob dylan hart on Oct 4, 2010 15:18:15 GMT -5
So I put out my hand and I asked for some help
(We tore down the walls I built around myself )
I WAS STRUCK BY THE LIGHT AND I FELL TO THE GROUND - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Well, he didn't think that she would have taken it as bad as she did. He watched her, not really sure what to say to her. He tried to choke out some words, and yet, his eyes just continued to water. It wasn't fair to her, or him. But he couldn't change that. He had to leave to go to Arlington for his father's funeral. He just had to. He knew he should have at least bought something for her, but still. He didn't, and now it was to late. She was yelling at him, and crying.
Biting his lip, his blue eyes started to tear up again. First his father, now Sapphire. Would she still yell at him if she knew the reason he had to leave? He would have to make it up to her somehow. Maybe, just maybe she could go with him? But she wouldn't want to after this. He stood up after she started to walk away and he held his tongue, biting it until he felt it was bleeding, tasting the blood in his mouth.
"Sapphire wait! It's not like that! It's not that i want to! Trust me! I don't want to go! I have to though!"
He said loudly, his voice screamed that he was hurt on the inside. When she said that he was just like everyone that bullied him, that made him snap. He chased after her and took her phone out of her hand when she was trying to call someone in the parking lot. He held it for a moment, before putting it in his pocket and almost glaring down at her.
"I am in no way like them. I wouldn't hurt you if i didn't have to. Trust me! The reason i have to go to DC is because my dad.."
He paused, trying to find the right words to tell her.
"My dad was a soldier in the war. He was killed in a road side bomb last night. That's why i have to leave. I've been in my house trying to hide all of the pills in the house so my mom can't kill herself over it. I really don't want to go, but its my dad. I have to. Please. I really didn't mean to hurt to. But I understand if you really do hate me, Sapphire..."
He whispered the last part, his head hanging, hair over his eyes. The boy was upset, and he was trying not to show it that much to her. But she yelled at him, she even said that he was just like the guys that pick on him. Of course he wasn't. He was a lot sweeter then them, and he would do anything for her. Except, he had to leave. It really wasn't that he wanted to go. Really, he didn't want to see his father's grave, but his mother was dragging him.
( W O R D S ? !) 755
( S T A T U S ? !) done
( O U T F I T ? !) live your lies
( N O T E S ? !) hope this was okay for a place..it was the only place I could think of.
( C R E D I T ? !) this lovely code was made by dear joey AKA xoxsilvermoonox of the lovely CAUTION 2.0 don't steal this or else I will send my rabid heffalumps and woozles after you!! (: the lyrics are by papa roach |
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Post by sapphire khloe madison on Oct 4, 2010 21:29:51 GMT -5
Great(!). Saffie now felt like the biggest jerk on the planet. The guilt was overwhelming. His father had died last night. As much as she still wanted to be angry at him for not even trying when she had sacrificed everything for him ( and if not that almost everything ) and as much as she still wanted to stay hurt because of him she knew she couldn't now. It almost wasn't fair, but, she couldn't change what had happened. His father had died, and that was pretty much the only excuse that could get him off the hook for now. The second date had better be the most amazing thing ever, however. She sighed deeply wiping her tears away with the back of her hand as she continued to digest everything he had said. He was going away for a week to his dad's funeral. That was a bit quick wasn't it? His mother was on suicide watch. His family was falling apart. As much as Saffie didn't want to be she knew he was the only support he had left. She didn't want such pressure. She didn't want to always be the one that had to look out for the other, carry all the responsibility, and put the other first. For once she wanted to be the girl in the relationship but it seemed for at least a week she'd have to continue being the man in their relationship. As much as it sucked.
"I'm sorry Jacob. I don't hate you, I promise."
She spoke quietly, glancing at her feet as she did so. She was facing him and had noticed he had put her phone in his pocket. Saffie had to admit she liked the rare moments when he was dominant. They almost made it worth it to continue on with him. As much as Saffie wanted to walk away right now and cry until Jacob either improved or the pain became so numb both moved on, she knew neither could happen. Beneath the materialism, the popularity, the vainness, and the shallowness, there was a good heart. The good heart told her she had to at least give him a week and a few days. A week to mourn his father and go to the funeral. The few days to give him a chance to do better on the second date. If he still screwed up then... well, then he wasn't worth it. Saffie so wanted him to be worth it though. She had always thought her first kiss would be with mr right. Saffie didn't know how on earth Jacob, of all people, could become mr right but she did hope with all her heart he could do it - somehow.
"If you need anything just let me know, okay?"
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Post by jacob dylan hart on Oct 4, 2010 21:53:40 GMT -5
So I put out my hand and I asked for some help
(We tore down the walls I built around myself )
I WAS STRUCK BY THE LIGHT AND I FELL TO THE GROUND - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Jacob stood there, waiting for her to say something, anything. He didn't really want her sympathy, if she dared to give him any that is. He just didn't want her to be mad at him. He would make up to her, he promised himself that. He really would. Sure, he still had yet to figure it out, maybe a nice dinner and a single rose for her? That would be cute. Maybe. He wasn't exactly sure yet. He would promise her anything to make it up to her right now. He nodded to her words when she said she was sorry, and that she didn't hate him. He took a step forward and wrapped his arms around her slowly, then pulled her tight to his chest, his wrist screaming in pain every time he moved it, but she wouldn't know that.
"I promise i will totally make this up to you when I bet back. I don't know how yet, but as soon as I get back i will take you somewhere nice. I promise you that."
He smiled at her and kissed the top of her head. He waited to see if she would want her phone back, of course, he didn't really want to give it back to her just yet. He would keep it, for now. Sapphire would get it back, just not this instant. Maybe not in the next hour or so. Really, it depended on his mood. Of course, he was still rather depressed on the inside, but on the outside, he smiled down at her. He really did like her. He would just have to make sure she liked the next date.
"So. I have a blanket in the car...do you still want to sit on the beach with me?"
Jacob asked her. He would leave if she wanted to go home, seeing as his dark blue jeep was the only car in the whole parking lot. He looked at her again, still he didn't let go over her just yet. He was still slightly getting better at this whole, dominance thing. He needed work, but he would get it eventually. He just hoped to god that she would still want to be with him. Though, if she didn't, he wouldn't stop her.
"And just so we make this clear. I will never tell what you told me about your past to anyone. Not even the dog. I promise. I really do. they can try to beat it out of me, and i won't let them know. I promise you that." he said, pulling her tighter, his wrist now in complete agony, but he didn't let it show in his eyes. He would never tell her that he cuts, she would yell at him for it. Most people frown on cutting. Since it really is a form of suicide.
( W O R D S ? !) 755
( S T A T U S ? !) done
( O U T F I T ? !) live your lies
( N O T E S ? !) hope this was okay for a place..it was the only place I could think of.
( C R E D I T ? !) this lovely code was made by dear joey AKA xoxsilvermoonox of the lovely CAUTION 2.0 don't steal this or else I will send my rabid heffalumps and woozles after you!! (: the lyrics are by papa roach |
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Post by sapphire khloe madison on Oct 5, 2010 15:20:16 GMT -5
Saffie let out a deep sigh as Jacob wrapped his arms around and pulled her against his chest. She couldn't help it. She liked being in his arms. She liked him too. She wouldn't have been so upset otherwise. It was sweet of Jacob to promise to make it up to her when he got back. He didn't have to. His father had just died. He had the only decent excuse, and anyway, since his father had just died he technically didn't mess up. This might not have been the first date he was intending to bring her on. He was probably really upset about the death and just needed to talk to someone. After all if lovers were anything foremost they were best friends. She should be there for him, and she should be here to help him feel better about the death.
"Its okay Jacob. I just assumed this was our first date. You don't have to do anything. If you need to talk I am here for you Jacob. I really am so sorry about your dad. I can't even guess the pain you must be going through."
Saffie couldn't help but like the way he kissed her head. It seemed he was maturing already. He already seemed so differet to the extremely shy and timid boy she had bumped into at school. Maybe they were good for each other. Maybe she was bringing out his confidence and he was slowly getting her in touch with her old self.
"Sitting on the beach with you would be great. I wouldn't want to miss it for the world."
She spoke softly. Saffie listened to him speak again. She knew he would never tell anyone what she told him. She trusted him completely. She was just... nervous about getting hurt.
"I know you wouldn't tell anyone Jacob. Your too... nice to do anything like that."
She responded gently before lifting her head up to press her plush lips against his. She kissed him softly and affectionately before pulling away. She liked how he pulled her closer. Jacob was becoming more affectionate and dominant by the day. She really liked it.
"Come on, lets go get this blanket."
She smiled softly, slipping her hand into his and tugging on it softly. Saffie had no idea which car was his but assumed the only car - a jeep - in the parking lot was his. Smiling, feeling better, she squeezed his hand as she made her way over to the jeep. He was an impressive car. Big, sturdy, powerful, and could go on all terrain.
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Post by jacob dylan hart on Oct 9, 2010 20:59:00 GMT -5
So I put out my hand and I asked for some help
(We tore down the walls I built around myself )
I WAS STRUCK BY THE LIGHT AND I FELL TO THE GROUND - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Hearing the huge sigh from the girl, he looked down at her. Was she upset still? Or just relived that he never wanted to ruin the date for her. He wanted to make it up, and he would. He would find some way to. How? he wasn't yet sure, but he would. He just had to think about it, and he had eight hours on a plan to list things that she would like. But wait. He didn't know a whole lot of things that she liked. Well, that didn't work out well.
"But I want too. I want to make it better. this was a horrible date so far. I'll make it up somehow."
Jacob smiled at her, knowing that he changed for the better. He knew that his whole shyness and timidness was gone when he was around her, which he liked a lot better then her getting mad at him for being quiet. However, his voice still had the same old soothing effect that it had when he was shy around her, and well everyone. He was still very very shy when it came to other people, people he didn't know, or people who didn't like him he didn't ever say a damn word too.
He was glad that she wanted to stay with him on the beach, even if this ended up not how he wanted it to be. It wasn't even how she wanted to be, but the worst part was over, and she knew that he wasn't exactly thrilled with what happened in his life, but it was at least better then him just blowing it off on her. When she said he was too nice, he wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not.
"I'm guessing being to nice is a bad thing? I'm sure you would hate it if i was to just scream out that you were a cowgirl when you little."
He would never tell anyone that. Of course, he never told anyone but his brother anything. He never even told him about his cutting til Xavier walked into the bathroom when it was just the two of them and found him wrapping up his arm. Even then Jacob made him swear not to tell anyone. He was very secretive, and he wouldn't tell anyone anything. He wouldn't tell Sapphire about his cutting, not yet at least. He kissed her back softly for a moment, and when she pulled away he made a pout face. He liked it when she kissed him.
"Alright"
He curled his fingers around her's when she held his hand walked with her to his jeep. Once they got to his car, he let go of her hand and pulled out a large blanket. It really was the kind that you sit on a beach with. He held it in his hand, and took hers back with the other hand and walked back to the sand with her. Of course, he didn't have any shoes on yet. Not really thinking about not having shoes on, he took a step and nearly stepped on broken glass. He noticed that, and walked a bit closer into her, avoiding the glass and walking back to were his shoes were. He laid the blanket down and sat down, pulled her down very close to him. He wrapped his arm around her waist and smiled at her. He kissed her lips softly for a moment before pulling away.
He was hot in the sweatshirt, but he didn't want to show that he actually did cut himself. He could always say his dog bit him, or ran out from under him and made him fall into the counter. Or he could tell her the truth. No. Not the truth. Not yet. He pulled off the black sweatshirt, most of his bracelets hiding his bandage, but there was a bit of white that still showed. He just prayed she didn't ask about it.
( W O R D S ? !) 755
( S T A T U S ? !) done
( O U T F I T ? !) live your lies
( N O T E S ? !) hope this was okay for a place..it was the only place I could think of.
( C R E D I T ? !) this lovely code was made by dear joey AKA xoxsilvermoonox of the lovely CAUTION 2.0 don't steal this or else I will send my rabid heffalumps and woozles after you!! (: the lyrics are by papa roach |
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